


Collection of short fics written for Mating Games 2014

by matchsticks_p (matchsticks)



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pacific Rim Fusion, F/M, Gen, M/M, Mating Games challenge, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-17
Updated: 2014-06-01
Packaged: 2018-01-25 11:55:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1647755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/matchsticks/pseuds/matchsticks_p
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of short fics written for the Mating Games Summer Weekly Pornathon 2014.<br/>Chapter 1: fairytale AU. Danny has to give a fuck about Stiles to save the kingdom.<br/>Chapter 2: non-penetration. Chris convinces Derek to roleplay a hunter and the hunted. Chris is a very literal person.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Once upon a time, the great Kingdom of Stilinski fell under a curse cast by a powerful evil wizard, who held a grudge against the king's undeserved good fortune ("Bullshit," the king claimed. "What Peter Hale is jealous of is everyone else's ability to be a citizen in a kingdom for longer than two days without making everyone else hate them or getting kicked out.") and plunged the kingdom into imminent danger of famine. The crops wouldn't grow, the rains wouldn’t fall, and the king called upon all his knights to find a solution and save the kingdom. 

The most celebrated knights of all, Lydia Martin and Allison Argent, were the first to make headway on figuring out the curse. "To break it," Lydia explained, "the knight Danny Mahealani must give three fucks for the Prince Stiles."

"Uhhhh..." said Danny. "Why me?"

"No one truly understands the logic of magic, we can only grasp thin threads of its mystery on occasion," Allison intoned wisely.

"Well, we're screwed then, because I don’t give any fucks about Stiles," Danny said.

"Great. Wonderful. Thanks," Stiles said, as he was a modern prince and liked to hang out with the non-royal classes and encouraged them to treat him as one of their own. The knights took that liberty a little too readily.

"I'm just saying," said Danny, looking pinched.

Allison opened her mouth to lecture him about the importance of saving the kingdom when Lydia, who knew far better how to manipulate Danny, interrupted and said, "There is one alternative way."

"Perfect, we'll take that," Danny said with relief.

"You will have to cross the perilous lands on foot in order to seek a rare blossom that only grows from the highest boughs of a tree guarded by a venomous serpent on an island of igneous rock surrounded by lava," Lydia said, raising an eyebrow. "The blossom is the key ingredient in a counter-spell potion that will be difficult to create and endanger the lives of all those who try to brew it."

"That all sounds fine. Better than giving a fuck about Stiles," Danny said. "Let's pack and head out at first light."

Stiles knew he had the right to feel highly insulted here, but he didn't want to appear a coward for backing out of such an heroic quest, and so he shut up and agreed to go with Danny. His father, the king, was so overwhelmed with pride for Stiles' bravery that he couldn't find it in his heart to complain to him about Danny not giving a fuck.

The first few days of their journey were uneventful. The perilous lands were, as per their colloquial name, perilous, but they worked together surprisingly well and saved each other from many an unfortunate mishap. Despite having no steeds, they moved quickly on foot and soon reached the desert sands, on the other side of which lay the volcanic wastes.

Nights were cold in the desert, but incredibly clear. There were no clouds or light pollution for miles and they could see the stars spread out above them like a second blanket as they shared one for warmth, huddling close. It was awfully romantic. Especially for two redblooded young men who had not had any other outlet for days. 

It happened that nature took its course and Stiles could not resist bedding the knight Mahealani, who was more than accommodating and returned his love so enthusiastically and so vigorously that they got sand in places that Stiles did not previously realize sand could go. And Danny, who was always so pleasantly compliant and yielding to others, turned out to be a surprisingly greedy lover, and woke Stiles throughout the night to slake his passionate thirst again and again. Three times they rode each other to completion, and when dawn broke upon their third coupling the infertile plateau of the perilous lands burst forth in buds and greenery.

"What...?" said Stiles looking around.

"It looks like the land is cursed no more," Danny observed drily. "In fact, it is now fertile beyond even the kingdom's bounds."

"Wait, give three fucks...literally?" Stiles made a face at how ridiculous spells were.

"I did think the wording was rather clunky."

"And Lydia sent us on this journey because she knew..."

"She knew of my deeply denied feelings for you," Danny admitted, blushing furiously.

Stiles grinned. And lo the kingdom Stilinski was saved, Stiles never let Danny live it down, and they lived happily ever after.


	2. Mating Games round two: Role reversal

Derek was enthusiastic at first when Chris suggested roleplaying. It sounded exciting, fun, something slightly naughty and therefore thrilling.

"What do you have in mind? Doctor and patient? Fireman rescue? Teacher and student?"

"How about role reversal?" Chris said. "You be the hunter, and I'll be the prey."

Again, exciting, fun, maybe even a little wrong too, which made it oh so right. Derek was picturing a naked hunt around the house with lots of prowling and shrieking and a "reward" for bagging his "trophy" at the end. How could he have forgotten that Chris took everything too seriously?

First, they had to go to the sporting goods store, where Chris outfitted Derek with proper hunting clothes, camouflage with flashes of bright orange so he wouldn't get shot by other hunters. ("But why is this necessary? We're not actually going out into the woods on hunting grounds, are we?" Of course they were.) Then Chris armed him with a big game rifle and wouldn't let him stop practicing until his firing stance was deemed to be acceptably perfect. ("But I'm not actually going to shoot you, am I? ...Wait, _am I_? This isn't funny, Argent, answer me. There is no way I'm shooting you for real. _Am I_?!?!" At least Chris finally relented on that one and agreed to no live rounds.)

When it came time to act out his little fantasy, they went deep into the woods and Chris got a ten minute head start.

It took Derek almost two days to find him.

"You have got to be kidding me," he muttered on the morning of the second day, scowling to himself, tired and hungry and cold from spending the night outside. Even with his superhuman wolf senses, Chris was proving elusive. Derek tried to track him by scent but he knew all of the tricks, doubling back on his path, travelling through water, climbing up trees, at one point somehow jumping a deep gully that even Derek himself almost couldn't make it across. 

When he finally caught up with Chris late in the afternoon, he couldn't be entirely sure that Chris hadn't taken pity on him and deliberately allowed himself to be found. He was sitting on a log, whittling a bit of wood and whistling to himself, after all. 

"I don't know what the hell you were thinking, but this. Is. Not. Sexy." Derek growled. 

Chris looked up casually and smirked. "What? I said we should play hunter and hunted. I just did what I would do if I were being hunted." He tossed Derek the little wood carving he'd made with his pocket knife. It was, of course, in the crude shape of a howling wolf. "Don't even pretend like you're not impressed."

Derek had to revise his previous statement. It was a little sexy. 

But attractive as Chris being lethally competent was, it wasn't conducive to actually having sex, not if it was going to be like a freaking two-day survival camp. So Derek pointed out, "You didn't say play hunter and hunted, you specifically said role reversal. That might be what you would do, but it isn't what _I'd_ do."

Chris quirked an eyebrow in interest. "Oh? And what would you do?"

"Oh, I don't know, a big sexy hunter like yourself after me, I'm not sure I'd work that hard not to get caught," Derek replied, matching his faux casual tone.

So the next time they played the game, Derek convinced Chris that they should stay relatively close to home, reminded him that he was supposed to be thinking like Derek, and thankfully it took him less than two hours to track him down this time.

The little smartass still made it obvious that Derek only caught him because he allowed him to. It was a dark night and there were no people out, but still—he was splayed fully in the open, mostly naked, slowly fisting his cock.

"That's not what I would do!" Derek spluttered.

"You said to imagine a big sexy hunter like me," Chris said in a deadpan. "It was too much, I couldn't control myself. Now, are you going to complain or are you going to jump on me?"

Derek wasted no time throwing off his hunting gear and claiming his rightful prey.


	3. Bonus challenge drabbles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3: Melissa and Derek sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s...; and a Pacific Rim AU where some people are drift compatible while some just want to hug a kaiju.

[Out of context Dungeons and Dragons quotes](http://outofcontextdnd.tumblr.com/post/82491369953/you-just-gave-your-mom-some-condoms-and-a-talk-on) challenge:

Scott turned horrified eyes onto his best friend. "Did you...did you just give my mom some condoms and a pep talk about safe sex?"

Stiles nodded, completely lacking a single iota of shame. "Well, she is going out with Derek, and trust me, she will give it up to him on the first date. I know."

Scott crawled into a corner and sat down, making wounded noises into his hands.

 

Crossover challenge--Pacific Rim AU:

Scott and Stiles are drift compatible, which surprises no one. So are Lydia and Allison, which, again, was not exactly an earth-shattering revelation. Greenberg is compatible with no living person they can find, which is fine because he's actually kind of an awful pilot not just of jaegers but of, like, cars and remote control helicopters and just anything. They make him in charge of the paperwork and everybody's happy. 

They have a pretty good operation going, but then of course Danny just had to be the one to throw a wrench in everything by refusing to pilot a jaeger with anybody and instead befriending a kaiju.

"This isn't possible," Deaton says, rather unconvincingly, to Danny. It's unconvincing because Danny is quite contentedly perched on top of a category 3 kaiju's finger (one of way too many fingers), trying to explain that the kaiju's name is not pronounceable in human languages.

"I don't care what its name is, we need to kill it," Deaton says.

But of course by that time, Scott's soft little heart has been won over, and then the whole operation kind of goes down the tubes from there.

**Author's Note:**

> Here is an extra bonus drabble for the sleepover challenge:
> 
> "Have you ever paused to think if we're too old for sleepovers?" Danny asked, returning to Lydia's room with a bowl of warm popcorn.
> 
> "Nope," Lydia said, lounging on her bed like a queen. She patted the space next to her and Danny climbed on obediently.
> 
> "Hey, turn the computer a bit, I can't see the TV," Jackson's voice said from the skype application open on Lydia's laptop, as demanding as if he were right there with them.


End file.
